One simple tip for becoming more persuasive

Today I’ll give you one very simple insight for how to become much more persuasive, and that is to wait. “Wait for what Filip?” Well, wait for your message to persuade!

Let me explain. When I try to persuade you, you are likely to put up a number of barriers. Perhaps most noteworthy is that your defences will go into overdrive the moment you get even the slightest whiff that I’m trying to persuade you. How many of us like to be persuaded? Let’s just say I don’t think anyone has ever heard the sentence: “Hi I’m Michelle/Bob/Karen/Tim, I’m a Capricorn, and in my spare time I enjoy travel, long walks, hanging out with friends, and being persuaded”.

Once your guard is up it is often pointless for me to continue with my arguments. Chances are that you aren’t even listening because you are now preoccupied with crafting your counter-argument to persuade me. And if you are not listening then I might as well stop talking… and instead start listening to you!

Now, the logic in my argument was not necessarily bad, but the problem is that you aren’t taking it on board. From behind your defences everything I say will be muffled and tainted with the label “wrong”. But give it a few days… weeks… or even months. The idea will still be in your head, but you will start to lose track of where it came from. If you can’t find an external source then it must be your idea. Specifically, if it is a good idea, then it is definitely your idea! 😉

So to persuade you I give you just what the doctor ordered… I give you time… time to persuade yourself!

This approach will not work in every instance – particularly not if my arguments weren’t solid. But then my approach of bombarding you with even more such arguments would have failed as well.

But when this technique does work it produces an extremely attractive by-product, and that is commitment. Because you believe the idea is yours you won’t have the option of blaming anyone else if it fails. So your best option is to make it work.

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